Travel in these United States today--UGH!

It started on Friday July 12^th, when as we were feverishly packing to make a flight at 8:30am from Fort Myers to DC, I opened my email to see any last minute emails and there it was---“Your flight this morning has been cancelled”.  What??  There was no rain! No hail! No meteor showers!  Sorry, our crews can’t seem to make it to Fort Myers to fly your plane—so ‘f--k you customer’ says American Airlines.  You can have your choice of another flight on another day and guess what?—we won’t even charge you a change fee!  How generous!

This happens more and more frequently as the airlines become increasingly greedy and find ways to cut costs all at the expense of the traveling public.  So the best we could do was to choose a flight from Tampa, rent a car, spend a night there with our daughter (a happy coincidence) and then fly the next day.

So finally we get to DC and have to fight our way through horrible traffic to get to our destination at the beach in Delaware for a few days of respite….until our trip continues as we again fight horrible traffic to get to Brooklyn for a few days in NYC to see friends, see a couple of wonderful Broadway plays, and then set out to see family in Quogue on Long Island while we had to fight horrible traffic to get there.  Yikes. 

The easiest  travel mode during the full 10 days was The New York Subway system!  Since we have left NY almost 17 years ago, they have made incredible gains in the system’s efficiency and comfort.  All the cars are air-conditioned and run on time.  The electronic messaging in the cars is informative and helpful….what a concept!  I was impressed, since my recollection of the subway was a nightmarish sweaty experience with people packed into cars like sardines trying to just exist until the next stop when one could get a breath of air when the doors opened or mercifully exit the underground torture chambers into the light of day.

But I digress---

So, then we start back on our journey to Fort Myers yesterday.  At 6am when my eyes snapped open as I realized that the predicted extreme weather front arriving that night coincided with our flight back from Newark airport that night at 8:30.   I would attempt to beat the crowd that would inevitably try to find alternate flights to exit the New York area in advance of the weather.  I looked at my email and there was a friendly note from United Airlines (our carrier home) offering to absolve us of change fees since the predicted weather might affect our trip, and therefore we could seek alternative flights.  How nice I thought!

Until I actually tried to do it……Oh!--the ‘conditions’ before we could actually realize any help!  Because we had a ‘basic economy’ fare, we basically were considered ‘steerage class’.  Since United has very limited service to Fort Myers, and unless we were willing to first go to Chicago or Houston, there were virtually no non-stop flights available in our fare class on any day.  Choosing an alternate city within driving distance of Fort Myers was not permitted until and unless the current flight was either delayed or cancelled…neither of which were going to happen until maybe an hour before flight time.  So basically unless we were interested in paying for an ‘upgrade’ (which at this late date would have cost us about $1000 for two one way tickets) we were stuck with our current flight.  Thanks SO much, United.  Not only were the ‘agents’ who we finally were able to get on the phone (after a minimum of 30 minutes of hold time) robotic and unmovable, they were devoid of any empathy at all.  We told them we were ‘seniors’ (which I detest having to admit) and had to meet minor children at the airport coming to visit us—to no avail.   We were treated to automaton type answers that were clearly scripted and it was like talking to humans who were masquerading as machines.  In fact the answering machines had more personality!

No amount of cajoling or pleading succeeded.  In fact one of the agents actually hung up on us.  Nice.

We were forced to drive to Newark airport from eastern Long Island as we watched the gathering clouds lining up to our west, knowing in advance that United would cancel the flight.  So, we could have avoided what inevitably followed if someone at United would have helped us change our flights on the phone much earlier, but no, United preferred to nihilate its customers.

We arrived at Newark airport just as the first large drops began to fall.  Then the indignities began to multiply.  When we finally got to the terminal to check in and deliver our one bag for transport, we were directed to United’s ‘economy check-in’ area two levels down where the poor people check-in.  Half the check-in machines were not working correctly; it was crowded, dark and reminded me of the old sailing ships where the steerage passengers had limited or no amenities compared to the elite passengers.  Finally getting through this step in the process, we then faced the daunting experience of security check.  TSA precheck didn’t really help us…I had to take off my belt and shoes and go through a ‘pat down’.  I actually don’t care about this security stuff, but it was still demeaning.

Finally through security, we looked for a couple of seats where we could spend the next 3 hours until our flight, as we watched out the windows as the storm unleashed its full fury.  It was only a matter of time (actually about 30 minutes) until the feared email appeared telling us that the flight was cancelled.  Now we were faced with standing in a United Customer Assistance line with over 150 people moving at two speeds:  sloth-like and stop!  We might be eligible for a hotel voucher if we wanted to stand in line for an estimated 5 hours. 

Miraculously I was able to sign on to United’s website and secure a flight today at noon, but only to Tampa where I will have to rent a car to drive 2 and a half hours to our home.  We weren’t finished with the difficulties however.  As Cecily frantically tried to call any and all hotels near the airport for us to spend the night, she was met with “sorry no possible vacancies tonight”.  She finally found an agent at one hotel that tried to assist her find a room at other hotels.  As she sat on the phone with the agent and he called  various hotels, each one he reached would raise the price of the room while they were on the phone!  Imagine literally hundreds if not thousands of travelers trying to find a room near the airport as more than half the flights were cancelled!  The hotels were raising their prices to astronomical levels while we watched! 

We are staying at a really bare bones (borderline icky) Howard Johnsons for $300 a night!  The website standard rate for this room is $87 a night at this hotel during all other times.  Nice!  Greedy is the name of the game, apparently—soak the already wet-backed customers simply because they can, right!

So, I am writing this, and then will pack our overnight bags and head to the airport to hopefully catch our ride home….to Tampa…..and ---Oh good lord!  I just looked at our boarding passes and it says “no carry on bags”!  United apparently will attempt to provide the final indignity!  We might have to pay additional fees to carry on our overnight bags.  Nice

My final admonition to you all is this:  NEVER, EVER, EVER fly on United/Continental Airlines.  You will be demeaned, mistreated and cheated out of your hard earned money, and they are unwilling to be helpful and will offer you horrible customer amenities if for some reason your trip is interrupted.  

Here is the final horrific story from this episode:  On the ride on the Howard Johnson shuttle from the airport to our ‘accomodations’ we were jammed into a minibus.  All of us were travel refugees from the airport, most of us were United passengers.  The fellow behind us had endured the customer service lines for hours the previous day.  This was his second day having to stay in Newark waiting for a flight on United.  The customer service rep provided him with an ‘amenities kit’ with toiletries, etc.  Imagine his horror when he realized that the kit was a ‘used’ kit…..he opened the deodorant stick and it was used and even had a hair in it!  Gag!

Thanks United!  May you enjoy a well-deserved and long lasting bankruptcy—the sooner the better!